It is only a matter of time

Dear Single Brothers and Sisters ..

Practice patience and know that Allah is saving you for an amazing spouse either in this life or the next, but His promise is indeed true. Know also that a person who doesn't have Allah will be just as unhappy married as he/she is single, for that is the only void that cannot be replaced.

“Allah has already written the names of your spouses for you. What you need to work on is your relationship with Allah. He will send her/him to you when you’re ready. It is only a matter of time.”

— Sheikh Mamdouh

Quran 4:34

“Men are the protectors and maintainers of women.” [Quran 4:34]

“The best of you are those who are best to their wives.” [Hadith Al-Tirmidhi] 

Beautiful Marriage

This is what you call a beautiful marriage in hardship and war! A Syrian man looking after his wife. Difficulty can never stop him for loving and caring for her.

Hadits of Nikkah

A woman came to the Messenger of Allah and said: "I present myself to you (for marriage)." So she stood for a long time. Then a man said: "O Messenger of Allah! Marry her to me if you have no need of her." So he said: "Do you have anything to give her as a dowry?" He said: "I have nothing except this Izar." So the Messenger of Allah said: "If you give her your Izar then you will have no Izar, so search for something." He said: "I did not find anything." He said: "Search for something, even if it just an 𝐢𝐫𝐨𝐧 𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠." He said: So he searched but he did not find anything. The Messenger of Allah said: "Do you have any 𝐐𝐮𝐫'𝐚𝐧 (memorized)?" He said: "Yes. This Surat and that Surat." And he named the Surat. So the Messenger of Allah said: "I marry her to you for what you have (memorized) of the Qur'an."

How to maintain your wife’s privacy from your family members!

1. Request your family not to enter your wife’s room unless she approves, for example, when she is lying down or if she has closed the door. (Note; every jealous husband should at least have a lock on his bedroom door!)

2. Ask your brothers not to hover outside her bedroom door.

3. No one should rummage through her cupboard or handbag unless she approves.

4. She should not be ‘deliberately’ overheard when she is talking on the phone.

5. If she has gone somewhere with your permission, everyone else in the house need not now where she has gone and for how long.

6. Her laundry should not be hung in a place where your male relatives can see her personal garments.

7. Sometimes, she should be allowed to eat her meals in privacy with you, where she will be comfortable. Note that scholars opine that the husband cannot force his wife to have all her meals with her in-laws…

8. Lastly, do not reveal her secrets or personal affairs to your family members. If they ask too many questions, make it politely clear that this kind of inquisitive behaviour is not right.

[Traversing The Highs And Lows Of Muslim Marriage, by Sadaf Farooqi, p. 72]

When my father proposed to my mother.

When my father proposed to my mother, he dedicated Surah Al-Imran, which he memorized off heart, as her "Mahr" (dowry). And when my husband proposed to me, my father told him that he would have to memorize a Surah of the Quran as my mahr. The wedding will not go on unless I've received my mahr I was asked to pick one of the surahs. I chose Surah Al-Noor. For all the laws that Surah contained within it and for the fact that it seemed hard to memorize on my behalf.

And before our wedding day; aside of being busy preparing for our "Newly wedded Nest", the Quran wouldn't leave my husband's hand an entire month as he was memorizing the Surah.

A few day before our wedding day, my husband came to recite to my father the Surah which he had completed. My father told him every time you make a mistake, you would have to start from the beginning all over again.

My husband began reciting Surah Al-Noor with his calm/gentle voice in such a "beautiful" scene which I will never forget. My mother and I would look at one another and would smile awaiting my husband to make a mistake so he would have to start all over again and by that increase my "Reward".

But my husband - May Allah bless him - had memorized the Surah off heart and didn't even forget one single verse of it. Once he finished my father hugged him and said to him: "Today I shall marry my daughter to you, for you have fulfilled her mahr and your pledge to me.."

He didn't pay me a financial mahr, and we didn't buy gold worth tens of thousands. He sufficed me with Allah's words as an oath/ contract between us. And the Question is.... I wonder what Surah my daughter will chose as her mahr in the future?"

— Hiba Ammar

Never Compare Your Marriage To Others.

Some wash their husband's clothes and it works for them. Others don't and amazingly it works for them too.

Some cook for their husband and it works for them. others don't and shockingly, it works for them.

Some are full time house wife and it works perfectly for them. others are not and trust me, it also works for them.

Some know their husband cheats and it works for them. others don't know and don't want to know and it works for them.

Some contribute to the upkeep of their home and it works for them, others don't and it also works for them.

Some are in distance relationship and it works for them, others are in a close relationship and it works for them.

Some sleep in the same room and it works for them, others don't and amazingly it works for them.

Every relationship works and will only work if everybody understands that no two marriages are the same, no two individuals are exactly the same, and no two situations are exactly the same.

Even when the situations are the same, the individuals are not and even if the individuals are the same, the circumstances surrounding those marriages are not the same.

We come online daily and read tons of articles about what people do in their marriage, the one that don't wash is calling the one that Washes a slave, the one that washes is calling the one that don't wash bad marriage (wife) material.

One of the major destruction to 21st century marriage is social media counselors, articles, posts and testimonies.

What works for you? How sure are you that the person you are copying is happy?

My dear, you are not mad, you are not a slave, you are not rude for seeking happiness.

One of your major goal is to seek happiness and peace of mind in your marriage, it can only be gotten if you understand that even if your name Is Amaka married to Emeka, you are not the same as Your Amaka neighbor that her husband also bears Emeka. You guys are different and unique in your own ways.

Please while you read things online. Please know what works for you. It might sound stupid to others but provided you have peace of mind and you are happy, please stick to it.

Everyone has their own share of challenges that come with marriage and everyone has their different approach to it. If you must copy, know what you are copying, know who you married, know you are different.

Your marriage is not second hand, fake or outdated because you are not doing what people online says they are doing. How sure are you that they are doing it? Some will tell you to quit but they have been enduring for years even when theirs is worse than yours.

Please have a mind of your own, know you are different and seek for peace of mind and happiness in your marriage. It all depends on what works for you.

May we have Everlasting relationships with our spouses.

The Best Way to Satisfy a woman's emotional needs is to listen to her and respond to her with compassion.

A couple that wishes to have a successful relationship must understand each other’s needs. A husband must take into account that a woman’s needs and expectations are different than a man’s. Great intimacy can only be achieved if a woman finds a complete, fulfilling relationship. So what are women looking for in a marriage?

Women get married to find a special best friend. They want someone who will share their secrets, laugh and joke with them, love them, cherish them, adore them, be romantic with them, and make them feel beautiful and wanted. They want someone who will be attracted to them emotionally through their personality, and attracted to them physically through their bodies.

A woman wants a partner who will strive together with her through this life; laughing and rejoicing through the good times, and sticking by each other and supporting each other through the bad times.

She wants a man strong in his deen who can stand up and take the responsibility of the household, and help raise the children in accordance with Islam.

A woman wants her husband to be her friend, companion, and soul mate.

Any good husband must realize that a woman’s primary need is emotional. He must take into account the prophetic tradition “The best of you are those who are best to their wives,” [Sahih al-Bukhari], and then strive to be the best to his wife.

Men have been assigned the responsibility by Allah to take care of their wives, and this entails treating them with love and respect, and striving to make them happy. If a husband can fulfil his wife's primary needs, not only will Allah reward him, his wife will be content with him, and together the couple’s life will be more harmonious. Moreover, when a woman’s needs are fulfilled she will be more willing to fulfil her husband’s needs, bi iznillaah.

The best way to satisfy a woman’s emotional needs is to listen to her and respond to her with compassion. By listening to her intently, with your undivided attention, and taking a genuine interest in what she has to say, she will feel loved, cherished and important. Realize that when she approaches you with her problems, she doesn’t necessarily want solutions, she just wants sympathy and understanding.

May Allah SWT bless all our marriages. 
#Ameen

Is There a Set Age For Marriage in Islam?

Islam has not given any specific age for marriage, either for the male or for the female. However, Islam has just suggested to get married at young age. Because marrying at young age can prevent a person from sins . There are also many benefits of marrying at young age, for example having both physical and spiritual chastity. Chastity considered as one of the most important things in Islam. A good Muslim should be able to guard his chastity until they get married. By marrying early, a Muslim is guarding his chastity well. As Allah says in Quran, Al Mu’minoon (23:5-6)

“And they who guard their private parts. Except from their wives or those their right hands possess, for indeed, they will not be blamed.”

Marriage protects a muslim to commit major sins like Zinnah. As humans undeniably has such kind of desires when they see the opposite sex, Islam asked a Muslim to get married early if he is unable to control or not able to handle the sexual desires well. Marriage acts as an outlet for sexual needs and regulate it so one does not become a slave to his desires.

Whereas, reaching the age of puberty is not the only criteria for deciding an appropriate age for marriage. Other factors such as the overall maturity of a person, his or her ability to differentiate between what is good or bad, he must be able to approve or disapprove in important decisions of life. These all things are need to take into consideration.

Islam says whenever you feel you are mentally prepared for marriage, and you can afford your wife’s expenditures, you should get married. The best age for a Muslim to marry would be when he is physically and mentally mature to fulfill the responsibilities of the marriage that Islam places on them. Hence, mental maturity is the most important factor to marry. And there is no fixed age of maturity, it occurs at varying ages in different individuals.

There is a debate about the age of Hazrat Aisha (RA) when she got married to Prophet Mohammad (peace be upon him). It is widely believed that she was just 9 then, and this is used as an excuse for child marriage and the sexual and physical exploitation. Every society and culture has its norms, we shouldn't be interested that in what age who was. If the norm of today's society is that a woman can marry at least at the age of 18, tomorrow it might say 25 or 30 that doesn't mean that people who previously marry at the age of 18 are pedophiles. It all depends on the norms, Islam doesn't force us to marry at this early age or any specific age but it depends on the maturity of a person and on the norms of the society one is living in.

#However, there are some negative aspects of society that are making the Nikkah difficult for example,

Dowry system in our society is making delay in girl's marriages and creating pressure in the middle class families.
If a girl has her elder sister unmarried then it makes the nikkah difficult for her too and causes delay in marriage.
Different caste systems is the major issue in the society which becomes the reason of wrong marriages.
■Skin color of a girl makes the nikkah difficult for her due to stereotypical society.
■A person who is seeking a lofty spiritual life on the inside, but is living a materialistic life on the outside he will have a very difficult time finding a match, which ultimately leads to the delay in Nikkah for no genuine reason.
■Some people paint an image in their imaginations of the person they think they should marry and they never satisfy easily which makes their nikkah difficult.
■Physical appearence is one of the major causes of marriage delay.

Islam is totally against of these things. And we all are needed to spend life according to Islam, we are not supposed to follow the wrong things going on in the society.
However we must follow the right things in the society to have unity among sciences

#Common_Questions

What is the meaning of maturity?

Like all other living beings, the human being too goes through a process of constant change and growth. This natural overall process can be seen distinctly through changes in height, weight, habits, skills, and social, economic and emotional behavior. All these patterns have been widely studied and discussed through psychology and other related sciences.
For girls, maturity may be defined as follows:
🙎🏻‍♀️'A girl's ability to manage a good life, her level of acceptance of the responsibility of motherhood and child-rearing, as well as her appropriateness in social behavior.'

From the above definitions, we can see that although one may have reached the age of puberty and according to Islamic practical laws, Salat (prayer) and Sawm (fasting) are now obligatory on him/her, but if he/she is not socially active and economically productive, then he/she may be termed as an adolescent, but not as 'mature'.

🙋🏻‍♀️The prime age of marriage for girls, would also depend on their mental and psychological maturity. It may be possible that in some cases by the age of 14, a girl may be mature enough to shoulder the responsibility of family-life and motherhood, but a woman of 30 may not yet be mature enough to do so!

What is the Age Difference Between Husband and Wife should be?

🤷🏻‍♂️Is there a relationship between the age gap of the husband and wife and success of the marriage?

Since there is a difference in the age of puberty of girls and boys, they don't reach mental maturity at the same age either. Moreover, since women lose their sexual desires relatively earlier than men, a 5 to 6 year age gap between the husband and wife seems to be appropriate. With this age gap, women reach menopause when the sexual desires of men have somewhat subsided. This would add to the possibility of the success of their marriage and increase the spirit of sacrifice and intimacy between them.

🙋🏻‍♂️If the man happens to be much older than his wife, in that case he could end up treating his wife like a daughter and the wife may think him to be more of a father than a husband. As a result there may exist lack of compatibility and friendship between the two.

🤦🏻‍♀️On the other hand if the wife happens to be much older than the husband, she may be more of a mother to him and not be able to play the role of a wife. This could lead to indifference and anger, for, there doesn't exist a mental and physical balance between the two. Under such circumstances they would be unable to perceive each other's needs. So a healthy age difference between the husband and wife is very important for a happy and successful marriage.
#Thus, we could conclude that the personal physical and mental state of a boy and girl are the most important criteria to decide on the appropriate age for marriage.
#my_dua
May Allah grant you a pious husband/wife who loves you, cares for you, admires you, sees the best in you, values you, makes you happiest, reminds you of Allah, makes your love grow even more for Allah and elevates your Imaan more and more every day and holds your hand in this life and in Jannah


#Ameen

No Couple Before Nikkah

Loosing virginity before marriage has become kind of common. No I'm not talking about rape. That's totally a different topic. By this topic I mean girl and boy both of them willing to have haram sex. Astaghfirullah

After the haram sex most of the time the girl and boy act very innocent. They'll be like 'you know I didn't mean to do it but it just happened'.

Seriously? It just happened? Whom are trying to fool? It's obvious that you know what you were doing. It's not like you were unconscious and it all happened cuz of some sort of magic.

The truth this that you couldn't control your desire. The Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) Said: “No man is alone with a woman but the Shaytan is the third one present.” You should be aware of it.

Just imagine your husband/wife had sex with other person. How would you feel? Doesn't it hurt? If yes then how could you do the same thing? How could you cheat your future husband/wife? Are you that heartless? Don't you fear Allah SWT?

It's too late I already had haram sex. What should I do? Regret and repent to Allah SWT before it's too late. Before the punishment comes to you. And don't do it again!

Note: Before marriage relationship is called Zina. It’s haram prohibited in Islam. A real man will offer you (halal) marriage Nikkah, A loser will offer you (haram) Zina. Don't be so stupid to choose a loser. Remember Allah SWT Always watching at you!

May Allah SWT forgive us, guide us and protect us from doing major and minor sins. 


Ameen

#Nikkah_In_Islam

If you're considering someone for marriage.

Brothers and Sisters, 

If you're considering someone for marriage do not allow them to touch you in any shape or form, not even to hold your hand. Don't allow yourself to be fooled that it's OK to do because you will be married anyway!

If anyone truly wants to spend the rest of their life with you they will not want to jeopardize your future together by removing Allah's barakah.

They will wait until after the Nikah to be with you, full of Allah's blessings!

May Allah SWT forgive us all our shortcomings & weaknesses 

Ameen!

#Nikkah_In_Islam

It’s Sunnah to marry older women.

1. It’s Sunnah to marry older women.

2. It’s Sunnah to marry a divorcee.

3. It’s Sunnah to marry a widow.

4. It’s Sunnah to help women in household chores i.e. cooking, cleaning, washing etc.

5. It’s Sunnah to put food with your hand in your wife's mouth as an expression of love. (graded as a form of charity)

6. It’s Sunnah to verbally express love, appreciation, and respect to your wife.

7. It’s Sunnah to forgive her mistakes.

8. It’s Sunnah to keep yourself looking pleasant for your wife.

9. It’s Sunnah to try to know the feelings of your wife and console her when she needs it.

10. It's Sunnah to be playful with your wife and spend quality time having fun together. (racing, story-telling, sharing happy occasion with her are some well-known examples)

11. It's Sunnah to recline and relax in your wife's lap.

12. It's Sunnah to call your wife with beautiful names.

13. It's Sunnah to not disclose her private matters to other family members or friends.

14. It's Sunnah to love and respect her parents.

May Allah SWT grant us ability to follow the Sunnah and grant us righteous spouse.

Ameen

When a Person Wants to Nikaah with You.

When a person wants to nikaah with you, and want to Avoid you from Haraam relationship
(Bf and Gf)
He wants to ask your Hand from your family,
He wants to make you near to Allah subhanahu Wa'Talla ❤☝.
He wants to remind you of Allah.
He Include you in every Dua that he make.

That's True Love & HALAL Love.

A Husband and Wife is like a hand and eye.

"Among His signs is that He created for you mates from among yourselves, in order to have tranquility with them and He put love and mercy between your (hearts): verily in that are signs for those who reflect.”
𝐐𝐮𝐫𝐚𝐧 𝐀𝐫-𝐑𝐮𝐦 [𝟑𝟎:𝟐𝟏]

Marriage Is Not Easy

Marriage Is Not Easy But The Allah's Help It Can Be The Best Time Ever May Allah Bless All Couples And Those Who Are Seeking .

AMEEN❤️

Spoil Your Husband He Is Totally Yours ❤️

Dear Married Sister's In Islam

There is no happiness in this world than being Married.. Always say Alhamdulillah for such a good husband Allah SWT has blessed you with.. Appreciate your man's effort thanks to husband for Completing half your Deen, thanks for husband making you a wife, thanks for husband for making you the Queen of his empire..Tell your husband that you love him, tell your husband he is your Jannah, tell your husband he is your king he deserves your prayers so pray for him.. Husband need your love & care, he need your companionship... Husband need your warm hug, Don't forget to wake him up for prayers, Don't forget to cook his favorite dishes for him, Don't forget to dress him up as you used to when you were newly married, don't forget to satisfy him as ordained by the Sunnah of Noble Prophet Muhammad SAW, and don't forget that he is a human being who is bound to make mistakes, so forgive him unconditionally & wholehearted...Be mindful there is no perfect Marriage.

May Allah SWT bless all our marriage and make it easier for those searching for Soulmate 


Ameen❤️

The Divorced Woman 🧕🏻

"Even if you see that she has a child and you see that she is pious, ask her to marry her because she is going to be the cause of many baraka (blessings) in your life. "

💍 Khadija the wife of the Prophet ﷺ was also married before him twice when she was 40 years old and him 25.

✅ And she was indeed the cause of many baraka in her life.

👉🏼 So let's not belittle what doesn't have to be.

#Nikkah_In_Islam

How Problems Start in Marriage?

Based on my experience as a married man I can tell you with absolute certainty that this is what's happening in many marriages.

When you first met your wife, she was the most beautiful woman. You called her your Queen, your darling, your baby, your sweet heart. Soon, you got married, life was good. You loved each other so much. Then sudden she got pregnant, sudden her looks began to change, from a beauty queen to something else. Her face and legs swelled. She loses her shape and figures. After she put to bed, she started to breastfeed your child, her tummy protrudes. She looks like she is in her 60s or 70s.

Now, Instead of you to help her repair herself body, improve her beauty, get rid of that tummy and swelling, you simply abandon her. You dislike her looks. You some times hate to see her. Suddenly your darling become get out of my face, or I don’t want to see you. So problems starts. You start to creates problems that don’t exist. You make every thing a big dead. Then you start to see other women.

Brother look, a woman is like a Car. When you purchase a Car, after sometimes, you need to repair it, sometimes you service the engine, sometimes you change some parts with new parts. All in order to enjoy driving it and to live longer.

Likewise a woman. She cooked for you for years, dresses you for years, conceive for you for years, breastfeed your child until her beautiful breasts collapse. Now both you and your children have drained and exhausted her. So what should you do? You repair her. Take her to place where people are fixed after their delivery. Give her money to collect those post pregnancy therapies. Buy good cosmetics and body creams for her. Buy new jewelries, buy new cloths. Make her comfortable. Take her out time to time. That's how you fix her.

but Instead, as soon as she begin to get tired, most Muslim men would start to ask for Fatwa, they want to marry again.

Brother, the problem is not your wife, the problem is you. Even if you marry 100 women, they will also deteriorate because that's the nature of life. Everything deteriorates with time. I’m sure if many men were to take good care of their wives, their wives will last longer, their body and shape will remain intact.

Brothers and sisters, this is what I do to my wife. I make sure she is the happiest woman. I make sure she gets what she wants. I try to make sure she is not depressed. Because depression and sadness can destroy women. She deserves it, because I took her away from her parents. I took over that responsibility the very day I married her from them.

Please be just in your house. And Take care of them. They need it. May Allah SWT bless all our marriages. 

Ameen

#NikkahInIslam